An Ode to Jogging (Throwback Style)

by Kim on December 21, 2012

Back in the 60’s, there was running (the kind that helped you escape bears in the woods) and there was walking (best known for its ability to transport one from one’s car to the bar in front of which one had parked).

But the people were restless. If only there was some similar activity that required a bit more energy than walking, but not as much as running…

In 1975, the University of Oregon conducted studies that led to a breakthrough in exercise science as they knew it. They developed a fitness program so effective, and yet so accessible, that it swept the nation through the 80’s, and still exists today.

They called it “jogging.” (Or “yogging”…it might be a soft J.)

throwback running 6

Part light running, part walking, this new physical fitness program was guaranteed to whittle your waistline. And the best part: you didn’t even have to change out of your mom jeans.

Apparently, you pushed backwards with the pads of your feet so as to propel yourself forward–not too quickly, but no too slowly either.

It took awhile for people to sort it all out.

throwback running 3 Like this??

(It also took awhile for folks to recognize the benefits of socks.)

…Hold on, I’m not sure if you’re fully appreciating this face:

help me  Yeah, Bill, I WOULD have shaved my Adam’s Apple if I’da known I’d get sucked into this stupid photo shoot today.
Just because I have these gorgeous, God-given thighs doesn’t mean I don’t also have a life off-camera.

Luckily, Farrah stepped in. Not only did she demonstrate proper jogging form, but she also introduced a clever way to hide your Adam’s Apple when necessary and illustrated the incredible volumizing effect jogging has on one’s hair.

throwback running 1

Lee thought she meant chest hair.

Speaking of clever, Lee also unwittingly engineered a brilliant new cooling mechanism: as your body gets progressively warmer while jogging, simply inch your jacket zipper downward until you reach the belly button region. (It may not be the most conducive to actually jogging, but you didn’t grow all that hair to run around in turtlenecks all day.)

Once that magazine hit the stands, the jogging craze was unstoppable.

Suddenly, people were donning matching outfits and pretending to do it on beaches across the nation.

throwback running 8 I just want to know who was like, “And then let’s just paste this other image of a random jogging guy out in the water somewhere.”

Unfortunately, the phrase “too short” did not enter the jogging community’s vocabulary until the late 90’s.

throwback running 4“We really should have put the barcode on the other side.”

Sadly, like so many fitness crazes before it, jogging eventually just morphed into a big fashion contest.

throwback running 11 Hmm…I know running in place when I see it.
And the legs of the girl on the left don’t exactly scream “jogging”…or, really, exercise of any kind.

If you find that you can’t actually move your legs more than 2 inches ahead of or behind you because your jorts are too restricting, don’t worry: you look incredible, and that’s what really matters.

Also, ladies, good news: jogging is guaranteed to keep your perms intact!

So here’s to jogging: humble beginnings, society-altering results. (Imagine what our waistlines would look like today without it!!)

Ok…but is this guy even wearing shorts? (Look fast!)

throwback running 7

Happy Friday! :)


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