I know I’m happier when…

by Kim on April 25, 2013

There are so many things in my life I have zero control over.

I wish I could make Mason’s food allergies go away. I wish I could feed him normal food without hovering over him, waiting for him to choke, vomit, or break out in hives.

I wish I could snap my fingers on a cold, rainy day and make it 75 and sunny.

IMG_3240Pretty sure I’m not the only one who wishes that.

I wish I could stop every dang appliance in our house from breaking down, just as we were starting to feel financially comfortable.

Life, right?

When I start feeling overwhelmed by my total lack of control—like right now—I know I need to switch my focus to the things I can control.

For example, I know I’m happier when…

…I read a book once in awhile. Like, for fun. I recently went on a little fun-fiction-novel spree, and it was exactly what I needed. I could honestly tell the difference in my attitude, just knowing I had that story waiting for me on the end table next to my bed, and I could be lost in another world within minutes.

…I get to leave the house by myself at least once a week. I’m pretty sure this is critical for any stay-at-home mom’s sanity, happiness, and emotional stability. I don’t care if it’s a trip to Target, a solo run outside…I’ve even settled for a short drive to the video store to return a movie. I just need to be: 1) Outside of the house. 2) Alone.

20130406_102856Coffee shop trips supply me with a whole new kind of high now.

…My house is relatively clean/organized. For now, my kid is young, and I still think of this as something I can control. But don’t worry, I’m a realist—I know I’ll probably have to cut this from the list someday.

…I eat mostly clean and exercise a few times a week. I know that if I eat too many heavy meals in a row, or too many rich desserts or whatever, I start feeling sluggish and gross. If I don’t work out for a few days in a row, my legs start physically itching. (It’s probably in my head, but who cares if it motivates me right?)

20130411_111652

…I go to church. We’ve been bad about this lately. Mason doesn’t do very well in the nursery, he always seems to be napping during the service times, I’ve been volunteering in Sunday School a lot (which makes me not want to go back again later to catch another service)…bla bla bla, excuses excuses. I know. We’re lucky that we can still watch our church services online at home, but it’s just not the same as the real thing.

…I have movie night with Brent once a week (ish). This has become a tradition that I look forward to every week. It might not be a true “date night” in the traditional sense of the word, but it’s time we’re guaranteed to spend together, and I think it’s been valuable for our marriage.

…I spend time with girlfriends. I love my husband, but there’s just nothing like the woman-to-woman connection. There will always be things I need to talk about, that I need a woman to listen to, and I love it when I can offer the same support back to other women. Plus, getting together with girlfriends often means wine, and I find that that can make me happier, too. :)

What’s something you can control in life that you know makes you happier?

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{ 11 comments… read them below or add one }

Liz May 2, 2013 at 1:41 pm

I like your laid back attitude. I think people put too much stress on everything that they do. Good for you. :)
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Rachel B @ Busy Mama Fitness April 25, 2013 at 11:35 am

Oh man, I hear you on the begin a stay at home mom and needing time for yourself for your sanity. Lately, I’ve only been getting that in the form of my weekly long run and probably am needing some time without logging miles but you take what you can get, right? I’m glad you’re realistic that you can only control the state of your house for so long! 2 year old boys… oh dear. Make sure you have that wine at HOME! :)

In terms of what I *can* control, at this point it’s getting my runs in. Even if my baby sitter cancels for whatever reason, with M.T. in the jogging stroller it’s still like my own time and I can get out and go whenever I want to. Since life at home seems so often out of control (M.T. tormenting the dog, climbing on counters, throwing trucks around etc), I’ll take whatever I can get!!!
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Rachel B @ Busy Mama Fitness April 25, 2013 at 11:35 am

Being, not begin! Ugh this iPad and its autocorrect and driving me crazy! :)
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Rachel B @ Busy Mama Fitness April 25, 2013 at 11:36 am

ARE NOT AND!!! LOL! I give up! :)
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Kim April 25, 2013 at 12:45 pm

haha you’re hilarious!

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Kim April 25, 2013 at 12:45 pm

I need a jogging stroller so bad!! What kind do you have?

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Katie @ running4cupcakes April 25, 2013 at 10:45 am

Love this post and the picture of you guys together! I am happiest when I get my run in for the day and I have snuggle time with my baby at night. :)

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Kim April 25, 2013 at 12:49 pm

2 beautiful things. :)

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PickyRunner April 25, 2013 at 6:56 am

I like my space so I understand your need to get out of the house alone sometimes even if I’m not married/have kids. These are all totally manageable things that keep you a happy person. I feel like when we make an effort to do those things for ourselves, everyone is happier around us too.
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Kim April 25, 2013 at 12:49 pm

Great point!

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Kim April 25, 2013 at 6:56 am

It’s good that you recognize that you need time away on occasion. I remember the days of staying home with 1 then 2 small boys – it is a hard (although very rewarding) job.
I’m happiest when I work out consistently!!
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