Top Ten!

by Kim on March 13, 2012

Thanks to the inexplicably warm temps lately, I haven’t had to daydream quite as much about tropical places and cool little beachy huts. Don’t get me a wrong, a beach vacation is definitely high on the What I Would Give My Right Arm For Right Now list (somewhere behind #1: have baby, #2: obtain rockin body overnight, and #3: discover way to make drinking a glass of water feel like eating a massive fudge sundae/settle in mansion in So-Cal with inventor’s millions), but I’m suddenly thinking more about camping trips, boat outings, picnics, and trips to the farmer’s market. Ya know, possible activities! It’s this thing called realism I’m trying out.

As part of my new realism kick, I’ve also decided to rename the Weekly Top Ten to just Top Ten. Cheers to other bloggers who can do these lists weekly, or even more frequently, but it’s time for me to embrace my limitations. At work, we make yearly goals for ourselves using the SMART policy: S=Specific, M=Measurable, A=Attainable, R=Realistic, and T=Timely. So this one’s for you, A and R, you wise little punks.

In related news, speaking of the inexplicably warm temps, I now have nothing for my baby to wear when he arrives. I have a closet full of fuzzy little sleepers and fleece blankets that will be just perfect for slow-roasting him on these 80-degree days. Just when I thought I was ready, GAH!

But enough about slow-roasting babies. Here’s the TOP TEN:

1. Top Easter Treat. “Bunny Bait” — I might definitely possibly be making this for Easter. I’ll even have a kid by then, so it will 100% justified!! (Isn’t that how it works?) You should make it too.

2. Top Motivational Moment. Please tell me there’s some Photoshop involved in that butt.

I mean: go diet and exercise!

3. Top Style I’m Digging Right Now. The big watch/bracelet combo. As with most trends, I was slow to pick up on this, but I’m really loving this look! Plus, can you imagine knowing what time it is ALL THE TIME? (Side perk)

4. Top Artistic Expression I Don’t Understand. I’m sorry, I’m just one of Those People. When it comes to art and fashion, I’m sure there’s something there…but I just don’t get it. To me, this looks like an out-of-focus swamp creature (a la The Ring) and a girl getting her butt singed by an erratic laser (and taking it like a champ).

5. Top Confusing Floor Plan Idea. Ok, I think I get it. You like to swim in the morning — you wake up and roll right in. (Or is it, you need to go to the bathroom in the middle of the night and roll right in? Eesh.) As a general rule, if you like two things, it doesn’t necessarily mean you should combine them. (Although now that I think about it, chocolate steak doesn’t sound that bad at all…)

6. Top Funny. I can’t tell you how many times I’ve blindly clicked Accept on these things, thinking “oh you pesky thing I don’t need to read!” Only to find that I’ve just agreed to install 9 life-sucking programs called betaxxkill.exe into the depths of my computer.

7. Top How To. “Guaranteed” crispy baked sweet potato fries–what! I’ve been dreaming about making these my entire life (more in the “what if it were possible” way than the “what if I personally could” way). I have to try this. If you beat me to it, let me know how it goes!

8. Top Baby Gag. I love jokes that involve babies being secretly super smart and sarcastic. I’m the eTrade folks’ #1 target audience.

9. Top Great Idea. Pre-prepped smoothie packs? GENIUS! I love things like this, where you trick yourself into thinking you’ve saved yourself time when really you’ve just spread it out a little. Keeping this one in my back pocket for now.

10. Top Summer Look. “Oh, this silly old hat? I just put it on as a joke like four hours ago (but I’m still wearing it because I realized I look super sexy in it, and I’m hoping people will assume I just forgot I was still wearing it. New profile pic!)”

Actually, it’s the dress I like, if it were a teeeeensy bit longer. I’m a mother now, dangit!

~Kim

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