Weeds and Smoothies

by Kim on May 25, 2012

I put it off as long as I possibly could, but this past weekend, it was finally time to fool around with garden tools while attempting to get a tan do some weeding.

I’ll be honest, the only real draw to doing any yardwork for me is the possibility of getting a little color. Unfortunately, I haven’t purchased any new tube tops since my girls basically doubled in size (thanks, breastfeeding!), so I had to cram them into this one, which obviously doesn’t fit. (I’m also wearing my BeBand as a strapless bra, since I don’t have one of those that fit either. I’m a real gem.)

Amazing what I’m willing to do to avoid tan lines.

Advertising for Vivint, the security system we don’t actually use. We’re just hoping the signage itself will scare the robbers away.

…Maybe I shouldn’t be announcing this on the internet?

Also, what exactly am I doing here, digging up grass?

The people who lived in our house before us seemed like really nice people, the one time I met them to get the keys. But I have to say, they made some questionable landscaping decisions. Which I’m now stuck dealing with.

My husband and I are all about simple, green, uniform-looking landscaping, like this:

Source: Google Images search for “row of hostas”

Not sure about the questionable white van in the background.

Unfortunately for us, our house’s landscaping looks nothing like that. It’s more of a hodgepodge of different flowers and plants, with no particular logical organization. Like, along one side of the house, there’s a patch of skinny lilies with a huge, full bush on one side and some kind of creeping, flowering ground-cover plant on the other side. The lilies bloom for a week or two, and then they’re just a handful of bare stems separating two plants of dramatically different heights. Does this make sense to anyone?

Maybe it’s just my lack of landscaping know-how, and this is actually brilliant somehow. But I doubt it.

I think the previous owners had something like this in mind:

You see flowers. I see a maintenance nightmare.

But their vision wasn’t quite realized. And even if it had been, there’s no way I’d be able to want to maintain all that.

I’ve been thinking about getting a landscaping consultation, just to figure out how we can get closer to the uniform-looking picture above (and how much we’d have to pay to make that happen while I enjoy a glass of wine on the deck). We actually have a ton of hostas growing nicely under the deck (possibly the worst place EVER to plant things, since it’s about five feet off the ground…concussion, anyone?), so it would just be a matter of moving them. (Scratch the word “just”…it would be a MAJOR job.) I’ll let you know if any of that happens.

Anyway, after my weeding extravaganza, I came inside hot and hungry. All I could think about was making a giant, icy smoothie.

Smoothies are my new thing. I’ve been experimenting with various Green Monsters (smoothies with hidden spinach–I promise you can’t taste it at all!) and protein shakes. Here are a couple of my recent creations…

Berry Monster

(I can’t really call this a green monster because it’s not actually green, but it does contain spinach!)

  • Frozen mixed berries (I bought several giant bags of frozen fruit from Target)
  • Spinach (I added a good two handfuls!)
  • 1 Banana (the riper the better if you like it sweet!)
  • Strawberry Chobani greek yogurt (I secretly don’t even like greek yogurt, but it’s super protein-packed and good for you, and tastes great in smoothies!)
  • Vanilla almond milk (or any milk) to desired consistency

Strawberry and Peanut Butter Green Monster

  • Frozen strawberries and bananas
  • Peanut butter
  • 1 scoop vanilla protein powder (I use Lean 15)
  • Spinach!
  • Vanilla almond milk to desired consistency

Strawberry Protein Shake

This was my weeding recovery shake. It’s very similar to the last one, and probably would have been identical, but I was out of spinach. Oh, and I used a regular banana instead of the frozen nanners. Just because.

  • Frozen strawberries
  • Peanut butter
  • 1 Banana
  • 1 scoop vanilla protein powder
  • Vanilla almond milk to desired consistency

Every time I make one of these, I play around with the amounts of the ingredients to try different flavor strengths and consistencies. No matter what I do, it seems to always turn out pretty awesome (except the one time I got a little too over-confident with the spinach…that wasn’t so awesome). That’s my kinda recipe–the more idiot-proof, the better!


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